Monday, September 19, 2016

30 Rock

So many epiphanies over the last few days. I really like this phase of life. Even as I had stumbled on some truths on Saturday, I was in teaching at my Sunday class, and out of the mouth of babes, I got validation. Pure serendipity!

The Girl and Her Chairman

My uncle wrote a biography for my dad's tribute, which I just read, and it occurred to me that my dad fought in the Nigerian Civil War and he never, not for once, shared his war stories and experience with us his children. I have a childhood memory of one monochrome picture of him lying shirtless on his chest, with a cast around his waist, and my uncle George - his half brother, stood by him. That was the closest I came. But it was my mum kept these pictures and would give us an account of his life in the military. Her version lacked detail, I doubt he gave her details too, and somewhere in my mind, I held on to Adichie's Half Of A Yellow Sun as the missing story. But one thing I remember mum always said on the topic was, "War? War is a bad thing o! Nobody prays for war." Now I ask myself why I waited for my dad to pass away before realizing I had all the time in the world to ask what his half of a yellow sun days were like. Just putting myself in his shoes for a moment, it must have made him feel miserable deep down to have a family and yet be a stranger to them. Not being able to share your self with your significant other and children must have led to thousands of internalized eruptions. Maybe that's part of why he was hardly home, even when he was not traveling for work. Quite brave to be happy on the outside, and heavy-hearted at the same time. All the time. He didn't have to walk alone. Maybe we could have worked this out, now we'll never know. With not much left to question, my gratitude goes up regardless.

The Lady and Her Chairman

Going about my activities this evening, and dancing in my room to Alowo Ma Jaiye, I bust a move exactly like my dad would in his good old days. I realize, giggle, and keep on dancing like him. I miss him. Sleep sweet Chairman.

Saturday, September 10, 2016

When the student is ready

I just had my mind blown. For years now, I've only known the first half of this saying by Lao Tzu, “When the student is ready the teacher will appear. When the student is truly ready, the teacher will disappear.”

This changes a lot, if not everything.

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Family plus one

Got a niece today! My sister had a baby in the wee hours of today. I am an aunty!!!
Thank you Lord :)

Sunday, September 4, 2016

Haiku: Dead On Arrival

Trying my mind on a haiku, and it got dark so quickly. Here goes:

Aching in an affair that's a still birth
Yet still blowing candles today
Because pregnancy loss is still a birthday

Morning Jolt

It's a thin line between taking a morning shower and grabbing a cup of joe, after all aren't we always looking for a morning jolt? A shower does it for me. I'll have a coffee for recreation, not as part of a routine stimulus conditioning. I'm also wary of consumerism for the most part. But what do I know?