Tuesday, October 27, 2009

And the Martians muse ...

Greetings Blogville,
Please permit me to introduce my blog-guest: Lawwyy. The entry below is one written by a young male friend, as he puts down his thoughts on what he imagines (or tries to) to be the musings of a young female a.k.a Venusian. Do enjoy the read and be sure to rate the write up in your comments, be you male or female. Here goes!

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"A man thanks God for not making him a woman and the woman simply thanks God for making her as she is" –Julia Neuberger

In Man is a continuous search of the why’s and how’s of everything around him, I love asking questions and getting the right answers is most rewarding. “What do women want?” is one question that comes readily along and it’s either a question that has never been answered or should never be answered neither does it get old. An interesting question I read off old heads facial expressions, I hear younger married or unmarried men repeat even little boys who perhaps cant express it in this rhetorical question. In fact Id say it’s a man’s favourite question spoken or not.

When I came about the question it more than satisfied something in me, it just kind of soothe the agonizing times you wondered why women never saw things your way, a way that seemed most rational or the times you couldn’t process their actions and the horrible times they just wont you let you have a straight answer. I love my mother and I grew up with a most beautiful sister but nothing on earth compares with the torture I go through when am not at peace with either of them and the bliss when we are on a same page. …so when a venusian turned martian threw the challenge at me I instantly thought NO! never, like a mindset I ve come to terms with myself consciously or unconsciously that I could never be able to reason like a woman would. Nevertheless I took on the challenge to see how much I could, so here goes…

Over the next paragraphs, I’m a 27 year old lady heading the Lagos branch of life gateway insurance. Below is thoughts in my mind over a 30 minute period.

When are we boarding this damn plane? Can’t wait to see Dad, its been what? 5 months? Pheew!!! I ve not missed Mum in a bit, to her its like marriage is I am made for (sigh). Oh great, that’s my flight, hope I get the good seat by the window, dang! who’s this bloke hmmm… is he looking here? all this men, they stare at you and size you up like they want to buy market, lets see what he is up to sha. Good just like I prayed for, a seat by the window and our bloke is walking here, God let him sit right by my side…oh well, he’s wearing a ring, like they say all the good ones are taken…and who the hell is this scruffy fugly guy cutting me eye?

I should be flying my own plane nonsense and don’t you dare sit here…oh jeez like he heard me, a courteous smile and hello in return that’s where it ends, scruffy guys just don’t do it for me. All this boys, guys or whatever they are called this days, they ve all the time in the world and they are never serious or should I say afraid.

I need a man, a real man, a grown man in all aspects am tired of baby sitting and those inadequate feelings or do I say I need a man like my father? Take Chidi for instance he says this and that, shows he cares and all but getting really serious is like some waterloo. Kenneth is just his mothers pet, mother said this mother said that…Femi is just a trust fund baby, I tell him daddy’s money cant make a man out of you. Chidi is somewhat promising but I don’t know jor, he is too broke to think of marrying soon. The least I trust of them is pastor Layi, he keeps toasting me and quoting scriptures but I somehow can see through him even apart from the hear says he seems a gold digger. I cant kill myself jare. I’m just going to have to wait and like they say good things come to those who wait but mehn time is going o, all my friends are getting married or are in a serious relationship even my younger cousin is getting married next month. I cant kill myself jare abi? I should take a quick nap its been one kin’ day like that and I hope this scruffy puppy respects himself.


So here’s my submission of thoughts in a young lady’s mind, thoughts anyone?

“The woman” a gateway of life, “a woman” an idea. You are man-Lawwyy.

18 comments:

Harry-Rami Itie said...

Good post there... When is lawwy gonna write a post for my blog?

funkola said...

we have a gazillion other stuff buzzing through our minds apart from boys, men, dudes, male folk, married men, guys, have i said men?
frankly, more often than not, you are the least of our worries.
e.g, on my mind now: food, medicals tomorrow, must not miss the flight to Abuja, remember to pack wig and gown, need to finsh these dang profiles before COB today. did u see anything masculine on my list?

funkola said...

sorry if i just sounded irritated:-)

MissBalance said...

FUNKOLA!!! I am clapping and typing! That was sooooooo close to what I told him!

MissBalance said...

Hey Harry! Thanx for stopping by :) Did you really mean that?

Anonymous said...

Great.... to put out the buzz in your head with such clarity is a sheer wonder.
You got skills girl - i like very much!

Douglas - http://mypoetrycrib.blogspot.com

MissBalance said...

Hello Anon, I think I should forward the credits to Lawwyy :)

Tobi said...

This is what I think...while you may inadvertently be correct say 70% of the time, from my little experience
I think they get to spend half of the time looking at what other females are wearing.from d stilletoes to the the
other lady whose eyebrow marks more of 30 degrees than 70.
while this may totally be off d point, self esteem determines whats on a lady's mind at any time.Once had a friend who was a lil overweighed. when in a plane, she prays no one gets the seat beside her.why? she wanna raise the arm rest and chill comfortably
if you come along,then you would be her enemy for the moment and she picks her ear plugs and listens to music or novel.

From the article, I can say she is an average lady in terms of beauty because more often than not, a very pretty lady's thoughts in an air plane
is completely diffrent with an average lookign lady. I dont believe any woman is not fine.:P (chuckles)

..and that scruffy fugly guy thingy....I must commend you, that never goes without happening.I think it gets reciprocated from both gender.

The last paragraph is it.Ladies should stop watching TV.Thats the only place you get a Morris chestnut's face, Denzel's debonair, Martin Lawrence's humour and Todd smith's build ...all in one man.

Lawwyy said...

from Mars...thanks for thoughts n comments :)

MissBalance said...

This sure was fun Lawwyy, don't you think? Thanks to everyoone who read and those who went to leave their comments. And to those reading now, it's still open.

aloted said...

LWKMD

Mr Lawyy, am sure all men will like to think all women do is think about men...but trust me we get other things way we dey thinks about.
U guys are just one of the many things on our mind
Nice read though

Miss Balance howdy!

lawwyy said...

ALright, alright...I knew I couldnt know what goes in Venus though. Miss balance I should not just ve tried. :(

lawwyy said...

I knew I couldnt know what goes on in venus alright, Missbalance I shouldnt ve tried.

My World said...

Lovely!!!
Lawwy, nice!

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

where are you? oping all is well. happy new year!

AlooFar said...

Splendid.

MissBalance said...

Hey!!!!

@aloted Soooo soooo good to see your footprints here. been too long!

@solomonsydelle Happy new year :) I have been away in Osun state on my NYSC assignment and unable to leave comments with my phone. How have you been?

@aloofar Thankies ... on Lawwyy's behalf :)

Off to your blogspots right away!

MissBalance said...

Hey MyWorld! Thanks for the shout :)