Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Not a leap year

Closing out this eventful 28-day month of February on a pleasant note.
Who wouldn't? Wasn't it this February that I negotiated the two parking tickets on my windshield, from 50 to 13 bucks? lol!

Thursday, February 23, 2017

One Will Take Care Of You

I was at my job place at 11am, feeling grateful for the flexibility to have taken my mum to the hospital and back - during my work hours. Grateful that the responsibilities of my choices to be a daughter and employee did not have to be mutually exclusive, and today they were not.

Being present and engaged with my mum through her medical exams and doctor's visits - which we've been doing over the last five weeks, left me feeling centered. I relish the not too many simple moments of intimacy in our unique mother-daughterhood. Like yesterday, when we walked to the diagnostics lab, and she thanked me in the middle of a casual conversation for being, in her words, so caring. And today in her mother tongue, when she called me “ebie roba” and reminded me of some conversations she had in the past with my dad. When any of her seven kids was being problematic and stressing her out, she would complain to him and his response would be, “Don’t worry, one will take care of you,” I heard that story for the first time, and I laughed. "I am happy and here to serve you," I told her, "and I will always take care of you." All of us together will take care of her.

Rest of the day rolled out with pockets of good vibes:
- Lala's off to Vegas - and I actually skipped when I saw her airport check-in (wink!).
- I had one of those flow states where I do really productive work at the job, and give my mind and skills towards achieving timely business results.
- And of course, short meetings. w00t! 

Left the office at close of day practically walking on sunshine, as the evening was a gorgeous 68F and warm. As I drove from the office to the gym, I karaoked to The Weeknd with my windows rolled down. I feel it coming babe! Yes! I made my body work hard for an hour, doing cardio and dumbbell reps, and somehow managed to settle in bed by 8pm, with Zadie's White Teeth novel. And yes, I thought I'd squeeze in a post since the day was a tad too young to end at 8pm. It's now two plus hours and a blog post later, and I'm going back to Zadie - who by the way will be holding a book reading in my neck of the woods sometime soon.

I've lived thirty versions of February 23rd, and to the best of my memory (or Swarm check-ins), none of them were as remarkable a day as today.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

sem·per fi·de·lis

semper fi: always faithful

What a powerful phrase.

Quotes: Archilochos

“We don't rise to the level of our expectations, we fall to the level of our training.” ― Archilochos

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Before it makes you hard

It was never about the weather.
The whole time it was about you:
Your becoming.
It was about getting comfortable with being uncomfortable,
Facing and embracing challenges and coming up better.
You're becoming.

This winter saw me shrugging off snow storms with nonchalance, singing cheerily as I headed home from work in the thick of two terribly cold and windy Nor’easters.
I remember last winter. It was my first real one as I had just become a New Yorker then. When the seasons changed and winter fell, it struck both my body and self esteem so hard that it left me sulking for days, losing sleep, joy and motivation, feeling stuck, overanalyzing my life and counting each of the days left till spring. I must have been something of a hybrid between a wet puppy and a deflated peacock.

This time, this second time around, it's way colder than last and even previous years, but I don't fuss. I don't remember to. I'm in the thick of hosting my family members for the first time, creating new memories, and appreciating the moments we have together. I have different priorities and sensibilities. But don't be deceived - a girl, this girl will still fly off to California, in a heartbeat.

If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. Now I know.

Monday, February 13, 2017


This was the weirdest and my favorite page
While traveling last week in Portland, OR, I went to Powell's City of Books. It's a local bookstore with a huge supply (four floors?) of books both new and used. Very impressive spot. As some books were already in transit from Amazon to my apartment, finding out that Portland (and the state of Oregon) had no sales tax gingered my whim and I ended up buying three books from the store. Two oldies: The Light and The Dark by C.P. Snow, Kiss As Many Women As You Can by Franki Elliot & Shawn Stucky, and the new one was Zadie Smith's novel White Teeth. As I flew back home, I read Elliot's Kiss As Many Women As You Can and the book was a total delight. The simplicity of the writing style and the genuineness of the content did it for me.

55th and 1st

Of monkeys and coconut heads
In a virtual place somewhere between 55th and 1st, 
Having asked for forgiveness, and the next time for trust 
Then he said, “I was always around ... I will always be here"

He's back here, making her Netflix movie recommendations
Here where? And her?
She says she's braver now, and I believe her
When she said so, I saw this new side of her that I admire
Yea, and as she talked about him, I peeped her heart jumping for joy.


If you could come up with your own Holstee manifesto, what would your lines say?
Holstee Manifesto Poster via Holstee.com

Picking Brains over Noses

“Show up, show up, show up, and after a while the muse shows up, too.” - Isabel Allende.

Bookmarking, reposting the 117 gems from this Brainpickings article by Maria Popova titled, "Timeless Advice on Writing: The Collected Wisdom of Great Writers, Fitzgerald, Hemingway, Didion, Sontag, Vonnegut, Bradbury, Orwell, and other literary icons."

Friday, February 10, 2017

Mantra and Practice

"I am very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud, never haughty or selfish or rude. I do not demand my own way. I am not irritable or touchy. I do not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do me wrong. I am never glad about injustice, but I rejoice whenever truth wins out. When I love someone, I will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. I will always believe in him, always expect the best of him, and always stand my ground in defending him.

All the special gifts and powers from God will someday come to an end, but love goes on forever."
Adapted and personalised from The Living Bible, I Corinthians 13.

Today I am not irritable or touchy even when I might get those feelings.
I am Love, and Love is my practice.
All the things that Love is not, I won't become.
Happy Friday!